Happy Thanksgiving! (6 weeks)

Hello everyone and happiest of happy Thanksgiving weeks from the Bulls! 

I hope you are all well, happy, healthy and having a great time with family! Hoping everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving tomorrow!

Hadassah had her first really long trip this week. We came to Jonathan's parents' house, which is 7 hours away from home. A looooong trip, which she slept through, so that was nice! The problem is that her sleep patterns were completely thrown off, so we haven't gotten a lot of good sleep at night since we have been here. Luckily, there are grandparents who want to feed her in the morning, so we can sleep in to make up for her being awake all night long. Please pray with us that her sleep patterns readjust well after the trip back on Saturday!

Something really cool is that she got to meet Jonathan's grandma, her great-grandma... very awesome since great grandma is a lot older! It was a really fun time, and we will get to see her again tomorrow for Thanksgiving. What a blessing!

Today Hadassah is 6 weeks old! Last night she weighed 10 pounds 2 ounces, and is eating more and more, leading me to believe she is in a growth spurt. Of course, that weight is on the scale here at Grandma and Grandpa Bull's house, so it isn't doctor's-office-official. The picture to the right is one without her brace. Some little-had free time, kicking around like she loves!


There are some fun things happening. She is smiling a lot now, and making noises other than crying... cooing and almost like laughing sounds, though not real laughs yet.

She is also holding up her a LOT more consistently. She has a strong little neck! 

Hope you all have a blessed Thanksgiving! Love y'all!!

<3

Four Weeks!

Hello everyone!
Sorry for the update a day late, but yesterday Hadassah turned 4 weeks old. :] And she will be one month on Saturday!

This week was a good one, as we finally got to see the specialist about her hips! He examined her and says that she seems to be developing well, though it was too soon for an x-ray. At her two month appointment she will get an x-ray and we will see how her hip sockets are developing. The specialist also said that the usual brace wearing time is 3 months full time (23 hours a day), and 6 weeks nap and bedtime. Seeing how fast the first month has gone, that's like no time! So we are praising God that she seems to be doing so well, and that there is such an easy fix. I guess the important thing is to catch the loose hips at birth, so thank God her doctor caught it!

Since the specialist is in Lubbock, it is also important to note that her first trip went well! She slept the entire time there and back... which was good with me. Hopefully she is as cooperative when we make the longer trip to the in-laws for Thanksgiving. :/

Something else the specialist told us was that it is okay for Hadassah to have tummy time in her brace!

It's only happened a couple of times now, but usually she's hungry and spends her time nose-butting the floor and eating her hand, resulting in an angry yell, or she simply lays and eventually falls asleep. She gets more exercise when she is hungry, and she has a remarkably strong neck and legs already! Her arms need some muscle and she will be crawling in no time. Ha! But really, her legs and neck are really strong.

Here are some more pics from week four!

 She is becoming more aware. Unfortunately for my sleep, it starts at 6 a.m. and lasts all morning.

At least I get a cute face to stare at while exhausted!

 This was when we got back from the appointment. Apparently getting up at 5 a.m. and riding in a car all morning made her tired.

Three weeks!

Three Weeks! And Happy Halloween!!

This is our adorable little ladybug!

In other news, things are going well this week. It feels like my hormones are starting to level out. The feelings of panic are further apart, and we are down to days between instead of hours. :] Baby H has been eating more and more, which means more dirty diapers, but she is definitely filling out her post-womb wrinkles nicely. Jonathan and I have been enjoying her times of increased alertness, and her funny sleeping faces (smiles, pursed lips, frowns, etc.) even if they are just gas or whatever. They are still super cute!

Her little umbilical cord finally fell off on day 17! Is that considered an innie or an outie?

Wouldn't it be so ironic if it was an outie, considering my paranoia that my own bellybutton would pop?

She and I have been spending mornings watching tv, studying, eating and changing diapers. I think I'm finding a good rhythm in it all. The new normal is sometimes a little difficult, but Jonathan is awesome about leading me back to where I need to be, and I'm beginning to enjoy the new normal slowly.

                   

                              That bow is as big as her head!         She loves kicking when we get her harness off! ha.

She had been sleeping well through the night (5 hours, and then 3 hours), but for the past couple of nights she has thrown me for a loop, sleeping less at first and startling me awake from sleep cycles. That's all right, though! :D

                                      This is the onesie grandma Dona gave her.           big yawn with daddy!

And ninja baby! <3 this picture!!

That's it for the update. :D What I wanna know, is do I count her one month on the 10th of next month? Or do I count her one month at 4 weeks? This is going to get confusing really soon....

Love y'all!! Thank you for your continued prayers and love!



Two Weeks!

Hadassah is officially two weeks old, and was 7 pounds at her weight check yesterday! Which means she is officially over her birth weight! Hooray! At her appointment last week she was down to 6 pounds, 8 ounces, which was a normal loss I guess for a newborn from her birth weight, but it still made us a little nervous. In any case, she has been eating well, and digesting well. Hah!

That's her. All harnessed and passed out after her appointment yesterday. So small and adorable. She just got done eating, her favorite time to sleep.

Here are some more pictures of her second week:

Awake and showing off her blue eyes!           And a Bull family picture. :D

Hadassah and I.

Hadassah and her daddy. She loves looking at him. :]         And Hadassah and her uncle Matt!

Both of us, quite tired.

As for breastfeeding, it's finally working out a lot better. Hadassah will drink from the breast and just about any type of bottle. The only problem she is having now is when my let down is really fast and she fusses because she can't keep up--but everyone says she will eventually catch up as she gets bigger. She still has some trouble falling asleep at the breast if she is only half awake but still really hungry, so a bottle is really helpful in those times. I got a wonderful contraption called a nipple shield that helps control the let down, and helps her latch when she's really sleepy, and that has been super helpful, too.

So, for those of you who I haven't requested daily prayer from, I have been dealing with baby blues. Heavily. If I've missed calls or texts that is probably why (unless it was yesterday afternoon/evening because my phone died! Sorry!!) I haven't had a lot of energy to talk with people, and when I do it usually involves some crying. It isn't a fun experience. But today has been good so far, so I will take it where I can get it! Mostly it's transitioned to a lot of panicky feelings that don't seem to have a stem (like, they don't come from feelings of incompetence as a mom, or being unsure of what to do with a baby. They are just there for no reason), and it is becoming less crazy crying. But I do a lot better when I keep busy, and make sure I have stuff to do. I still feel a little panicked, but it tends to overtake me less. So I will be studying a lot, cleaning and cooking a lot, and trying my best to keep busy. Continued prayer is needed that I would trust God, and lean into Him when it gets rough while I'm home alone during the day.

That all being said, Jonathan and I are falling more and more in love with our little one as her wrinkles fill out in her hands and feet, and she graces us with her unusual awake times. Jonathan adores just looking at her, and loving on her, and it's such a joy to watch him shower her with love. She is such a blessing to us! 

She is still sleeping a lot, but she IS only two weeks old! It's a lot to take in and learn. It's been a blessing the past two nights that she has slept for 5 hours in a row before waking up, and then another three before we have to start our day. It was 4 hours last week, so it's nice to see it lengthening a little. She is a good sleeper, and I can praise God for it, now that she is gaining weight and waking up to eat regularly during the day. If we are lucky, this sleeping at night trend will continue until she teethes (which is what my dad told me I did! Slept through the night until teething...) and then we can cross that hurty, sad bridge when we come to it.

Thank you for your continued thoughts and prayers! And to the ladies who commented on my last post, thank you so much for your encouragement!! It is great to hear that this is normal, and that there is an end to these feelings. We appreciate everyone! Love!!

One Week.

Well. It's been one week since the birth of my daughter, Hadassah! Well, technically it will be one week at 8:56 pm. And there is a lot to update, and I think I might be too candid. If so, I'm sorry. So without further ado:

We went in for our appointment on Wednesday of last week, they did an ultrasound and found out that she had flipped sometime during the week and was now breech. They also found that the amniotic fluid was low, so they immediately shipped us off to the hospital for a c-section... without explaining a lot. Which really freaked me out. By the time we got there, they had prepped my room and were finding a time for the surgery. I hadn't ever had surgery before so I was just a lot nervous and scared. Not to mention my only experience with anesthesia had not been a pleasant one (wisdom teeth removal, anesthesia resulting in a panic attack. Not a great experience.)

So they set my c-section for 8:30 pm (at the time it was about 4:30 pm, but we had eaten right before the appointment and they had to wait some hours after I had eaten). In the end, they wheeled me into the room at 8:15pm. I was getting a little panicky already, as it was my first surgery. Jonathan was amazingly supportive, and absolutely amazing. Here he is pre-c-section:

The anesthesiologist was great. He was funny and eased my nerves. The nurses were great, too, trying to calm me. In the end when the spinal kicked in, it really freaked me out and my lungs felt too heavy to breathe. I panicked. :/ But the anesthesiologist really helped me by telling me what was going on in my body, and assuring me that if I could talk, I could breathe. Jonathan came in, and could see I was struggling, and I think him just being there really helped me. It was a comfort being able to know he was there. I completely forgot what I was there for until they said "it's a girl!" and I started asked Jonathan if he could see her. He couldn't because she was still behind the blue clothe, but he updated me as soon as he could see her. Here is my first glimpse of her:

Totally took the panic away. And then she and Jonathan wisked away to get her cleaned up and checked out, while I got stitched up and put together, and then went to recovery for an hour. It was a long while until I could feel my extremeties. And they moved me into my room with my little girl beside me, and my wonderful husband following along!

Apparently because she was breech, she had her feet up by her head and her hips are a little loose, so she has to be in a brace for a few months (the time depends on how fast the hips correct themselves and develop). It makes changing diapers a little more difficult, but otherwise she doesn't seem to mind it.

The hospital stay was not long, but those nights felt really weird with her waking us up, and my not being able to move around much... learning and not always succeeding in nursing and trying to wake her up to eat when all she wanted to do was sleep. It was really frustrating being worried she wasn't eating and when she would just fall asleep when I would try to nurse. (Unfortunately this continued until we came home.) That being said, there were really good times of awe, just looking at our baby and loving her:

The hospital stay wasn't even a full 48 hours (the apparent norm for c-sections). We went in Wednesday night and were out on Friday afternoon. Everyone was really surprised that I wasn't hurting a lot, and could walk around pretty well. I'm still a little sore on my muscles above my inscision, but doing well. So we went home:

At home my hormone levels really took a turn for the worst, getting me really depressed and leaving me feeling empty. It didn't help that we were always panicking by how much she was sleeping, how little she was eating, and the frustration with breast feeding, which made me more depressed. We finally had to supplement with formula so she wouldn't get dehydrated. And then I got a pump, and we have been interchanging the breastfeeding that the bottle feeding as she allows. It's still a little disappointing sometimes, but I'm just glad she is eating regularly. I don't think it's good for me to worry too much about breast or bottle or formula or whatever, because it just really gets me down (and I'm not even totally sure why it means anything to me to begin with)-- and a depressed mommy isn't any good to a new baby. I'm already fighting baby blues from hormones, I shouldn't be worrying about the other stuff as long as the doctor tells me she is healthy! We go to the pediatrician today, so more updates after that!